Written by Chalupa
Friday, 10 September 2010 17:32
El Duder, or Tom as he's known to many, had a pet turkey of sorts that decided to live on Tom's property. This turkey was a feisty one and definitely lived life to its fullest. Unfortunately he also thought he was king of the world and acted these feelings out by being aggressive towards people and wandering about in the street. Here's a photo from when I was at Dude's house before Lebowski Fest this summer.
And so in memory of this turkey, I've re-written Walter's eulogy for Donny.
Gladys was a good watchdog, and a good
turkey. He was. . . He was one of us.
He was a turkey who loved the outdoors,
and attacking visitors, and as a tree climber he explored
the trees of northwestern Indianapolis,...
...to Meridian and up to W 86th St.
He died--he died as so many young turkeys
of his generation, before his time.
In your wisdom Lord you took him.
As you took so many bright flowering
young birds, at Thanksgiving and Christmas...
...and Renaissance Fairs. These young turkeys gave
their lives. And so'd Gladys.
Gladys who loved chasing cars.
And so, Gladys--I mean whatever your name changed to
after Tom realized you were a man-turkey,
in accordance with what we think
your dying wishes might well have
been, we commit your final mortal remains
to the bosom of...
...Central Indiana, which
you loved so well.
Goodnight, sweet prince.